This will be a good week for fun, festivities, and especially fashion. Let your clothes do the talking and don't skimp on the accessories. Happy. Happy. Happy. Happy. Sad. Sad. Sad. Sad. Which one of these will you be this week? On a good day, a Barnacle and a Clam can be as an effective a double act as Doris Day and Tiger Woods.
The Snail February 20th - March 9th
You will have an important meeting with your boss this week. Be careful, the wrong choice of shoes will prove disastrous to your career. A famous sailor once said "You can kiss a mermaid, but you might still die of scurvy"...these words will have special significance for you this week. There is a Clam that is going to do something to you this week which will annoy you greatly. But be prepared by buying a good quality stain remover ahead of time.
The Limpet March 10th - May 1st
This week will see you face many important questions. It is important that you answer those questions. Running away from things will not help problems this week. Neither will staying where you are. Meet up with an Oyster for a fun time on Thursday.
The Clam May 2nd - June 2nd
Computer problems might cause you headaches this week. Best stick to using a pen and paper. This is a week that is much less about who you are, but much more about who you could be. You are a kitten but you want to be a tiger. Become the tiger! You know a Squid who is in trouble this week. Time for a bit of Clam-support.
The Squid June 3rd - July 25th
Even when everything is going wrong, and it will go wrong this week, just be thankful that you're not Pablo Piccaso, A famous fisherman once noted that while five fish will always feed a family of four, four fish might not feed a family of five. These words will have special meaning for you this week. When you and that lovable Oyster colleague of yours get together, then sparks will fly. Unfortunately, that might lead to a charge of arson this week, so best cancel that Saturday night get-together.
The Slug July 26th
Hanging out with a Scallop on Saturday might gain you some attention as you bask in the aura of Mr/Mrs Popular. However, they will hate you for this unwanted association and your evening may well end with the threat of extreme physical violence. Too many cooks spoil the broth, but if you are making the broth, then you will spoil it all by yourself. On Sunday, the number 62 will signify bad news. Really. Bad. News.
The Oyster July 27th - August 19th
Making more room for music this week will ease current frustrations. The more avant-garde the music the better, and 50's Jazz will particularly prove helpful. A ship needs a rudder, a ship needs a captain, and a ship needs appropriate health and safety information. Who is the captain of your ship, and who has their hand on the rudder? And most importantly, do you have a life-jacket? You will fall in love with a Squid on 6:45 am on Tuesday. By 7:15 you will realize that actually they are quite repulsive.
The Scallop August 20th - October 1st
Try experiencing the quirkier side of life when you next read a book by only reading the odd-numbered pages. If you smoke, then this is a good week to give up. If you don't smoke, then maybe this is a good week to try. Hot fudge sauce will be your downfall this week, and the reason for this is that you will believe the foolish advice of a Scallop that you know. Believe me, hot fudge sauce is never the solution to problems in the bedroom.
The Octopus October 1st - October 29th
You are a fighter, not a quitter. Don't let the bastards grind you down. Tell a loved one that you love them this week. Also tell someone you hate that you hate them. Life is all about balance. The letters F, Y, and K will all be very important to you this week, especially in conjunction with a Scallop wearing yellow. Be especially cautious if they offer you a hot-dog, but don't offer you any mustard.
The Mussel October 30th - December 1st
The current problems with your job are partially due to the monotony that surrounds you. Kick start your career by doing something to shock your colleagues and show them your inner beast. A forthcoming trip is causing you much stress, Speak to your doctor for advice. Remember, it is always better to arrive early. Arriving late is a sign of a drunken loser.
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment