Making more room for music this week will ease current frustrations. The more avant-garde the music the better, and 50's Jazz will particularly prove helpful. A religious fanatic with a speech impediment will cause you much grief this week. When a Barnacle and a Mussel get together, it's a bit like adding treacle to a slow burning fire. You have been warned.
It may not make much sense now, but carry an opened umbrella with you on Wednesday (whatever the weather) and you will be thankful that you did. Be careful not to overexert yourself in the kitchen this week. Remember, too many broths spoil the cook. It is imperative that you find a roller coaster to ride on Sunday. Your life needs some excitement, and if you want an added kick, don't wear the safety harness.
Take a loved one on a surprise vacation this week and they will be very appreciative, especially if you take them overseas. Why do people infuriate you so much? Could it be because they are all idiots? Probably. You once knew a Limpet who was vile, repugnant, and had a tendency to sweat heavily. Well bad news for you because that very same family member will be knocking on your door this week.
Avoid cheesecake at all costs this week, except on Monday where a small slice of cheesecake will be tolerable (but not if it contains unripened fruit). You think that someone is out to get you, you think that they want to see you squashed like a bug. You are wrong. They are wrong. Everyone is wrong. Hook up with a Squid this week in order to relieve those bedroom tensions. Try to avoid using tinned fruit though.
You can dance this week if you think that kicking up your heels will make you happier. By the way, it won't. Are olives really 'the Devil's grape'? This is the week where you will find out. You may be asked your age this week by a close business colleague...they may be trying to get you into trouble so you should probably lie.
Your miserable existence will take a further turn for the worse this week, so be prepared to sink to new lows. This week, you should be wary of the hapless idiot...especially when the idiot in question is you. Too many cooks spoil the broth, but if you are making the broth, then you will spoil it all by yourself.
Indecision will be your undoing this week. You will say yes, only to then say no. You say will 'large iced latte' only to change your mind to a 'small Americano'. You will say 'I do' only to then have second thoughts and run out the church. Happiness. Happiness. Happiness. Happiness. Happiness. It's a happy week! Get some attention this week by wearing 7 items of clothing on Monday, and then remove an item each day
If you make an appointment on Monday then it will be cancelled, delayed or postponed. The trick will therefore be to make the appointment for a day that you can't make. An accident involving tofu will cause you to dial the emergency services this week. Make sure that you have plenty of warmed milk to hand, and don't worry about the resulting stains. This week you may take any life-threatening actions that come your way. But whatever you do, go easy on the chili sauce.
Wear a smile on this week because you cannot fail* and everything you do will turn out to be magical and rewarding (* = terms and conditions may apply). One of the following objects will potentially cause you to have a life-altering event this week: a red car, an unripe avocado, Thursday's edition of your local newspaper, or a vibrating electronic device. Turn up on time for a meeting with a Clam on Tuesday and experience the 'Clocktopus Effect' - a beneficial outcome that will have arisen because you were on time.
Numbers will prove problematic for you this week. It could be a birthday or other important date, or it could be the lottery. Step wisely when choosing any number. You might be familiar with the saying that 'you cannot buy success', well this might be a good week to try anyway. 'Wham, bam, thank you Clam'...that might be a motto for you to learn this week as Clam-antics in the bedroom will get you all worked up.
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment